Choosing a bridesmaid dress for the females in your wedding party is no easy task, but it can be one of the most fun parts of the wedding planning process. Inviting the special women in your life to be your bridesmaids; your sisters, your lifelong friends, your cousins, and special family friends; is a way to seal important friendships during this very special time in your life.
Naturally, it’s the couple who will be the focus of attention on the wedding day, but it’s important for the bridesmaids to look gorgeous too. Choose something simple and not overdecorated or detailed, but which will make your bridesmaids look elegant and sophisticated.
It’s important to choose a dress style which will flatter everyone’s figure. This is never an easy task, but empire waists and A-line or princess skirts will tend to suit most shapes and sizes. A very nice alternative, and one I recommend, is to choose the fabrics and colors and allow each individual bridesmaid to choose her own dress style. Separates are definitely an option too. Mixing and matching separate tops and skirts makes it easier to find a style that suits each individual bridesmaid.
Always keep a budget in mind for your bridesmaid’s gowns. Some times you can find sales or dresses even cheaper if you go to the right store. If you have your heart set on a more expensive gown, or one of your bridesmaids is financially unable to purchase the gown, you might consider helping out or give another dress option. Having someone be a part of your big day is more important.
Classic Looks for Bridesmaids
Any kind of formal gown, semi-formal, or evening dress can be chosen as a bridesmaids gown, so you have literally thousands of options. Satin, organza, chiffon, georgette, tulle, lace, brocades, and crepe are all classic fabrics for bridesmaid dresses.
You should think about the time of year you plan to hold the wedding, and how this will affect your gown choices. Choose lighter fabrics for summer, and a sleeveless or even a strapless dress style. If your wedding is planned for a cooler time in the year, long skirts and sleeves are best, or include a shawl or wrap as a gift.
Though a lot of people tend to choose their colors according to the time or season of the year, it’s not really necessary. If you want a color that isn’t typically seen in the winter, do it anyways. My only recommendation is to make sure they match your floral choices so your gowns will tone in nicely with the bouquets. Discussing your color ideas with your florist will make the job of choosing colors much easier. In the end, black never goes out of style.
The simplest look will tend to work best, so accessories should best be kept to a minimum. Often a simple pair of earrings or necklaces are all the jewelry you’ll need. If you want to give a gift and keep things uniform, you can also gift jewelry to your bridesmaids to be worn on your wedding day.
Keep comfort as well as style in mind when you choose shoes for your bridesmaids. Very high heels may be uncomfortable to stand in for any period of time. I once wore 3.5″ heels and personally was in pain because I don’t wear heels regularly. So keep that in mind as well as the fact that the bridesmaids will most likely be wearing the shoes for the wedding ceremony and the reception. Choose shoes which will be comfortable to wear all day, then dance away the night.
I know you’ve been looking forward to your wedding day for some time now. Planning has taken you months, if not years. From your venue to your first pick photographer to the DJ that will keep the dance floor hopping. The perfect stationery and the flowers to match. The hairstyles, the outfits, and even the favors. Everything has been meticulously picked and put together to reflect your vision.
As the day gets closer you start to get back your RSVPs and you get a little more excited with each one. You slowly start to see everything coming together and everyone there that you love celebrating you two. Then one day it’s all gone.
My Heart Goes Out To You
This pandemic has come at the worst possible time for weddings in Ohio. It impacts so many and you are one of the hundreds if not thousands of couples who will be affected by this. Whether you have already made the choice to postpone or are patiently waiting to hear if your wedding day will move forward. My heart goes out to you.
I know you are probably working through so many emotions right now. Anger, frustration, disappointment, and sadness. You are crushed and at the same time feel guilty. Your wedding day is the most important day for you right now, but people are losing their jobs and even their lives. Don’t get me wrong, yes it can seem trivial in the grand scheme of things, but you are valid in your feelings too.
I can also tell you that it’s going to be OK. Your perfect person will still be there with you at the end of this. Your big day will still happen. It may not be on the date you picked, but it will still be on a perfect day. Your family will have even more reason to celebrate with you. You will come out of this stronger and even more ready to get married.
I know it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and that things seem really hard and heavy right now. I know that you’re heart may be breaking, but take a step back and breathe. Look over at your perfect person as you read this and remember the real reason you are doing this. To marry them. Although it may not be exactly as you have envisioned, it will still happen and it will be just as perfect.
When planning your wedding the music you choose for your first dance can be a daunting task. It must be just perfect and reflect you as a couple, not to fast and not too slow. Something you both like and can dance to. Maybe something that’s not too long for those who don’t like to dance in front of others. There’s a lot that can be taken into account when picking.
My first recommendation is to look at songs that are meaningful to both of you. Something you may have danced to before or maybe something you sing together. A song that comes on the shuffle and it always makes you think of each other.
If all else fails you can find many examples of songs to pick from with a simple Google search. The problem with that is, although you may think Christina Perri or Ed Sheeran are amazing picks with the most beautiful songs, so does everyone else getting married.
To help with that, here are some songs that I pulled together that are not overplayed every weekend. Some are songs that I love and knew I wanted to share. Some I just happened to find and thought were perfect.
Top 10 Picks for First Songs
I Get to Love You by Ruelle – This is by far one of my most favorite first dance songs and not many people have found it yet.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1mkYWkoXyo
Beyond by Leon Bridges – A song from a man to a woman explaining why she is so important to him and hoping that she will be their everything. It has a simple beat and easy to sway to.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELPOCJvDz3w
Lover (First Dance Remix) by Taylor Swift – Remixed specifically for first dances and just recently released. Will this be the song of the 2020 wedding season? Beautiful, enchanting and completely meaningful.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmT4Y8w1nho
You’re My Best Friend by The Once – As a big fan of Queen I love the original, but this is such a beautiful cover that it cannot be overlooked.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I8aUHv0Newo
Speechless by Dan & Shay – By the video itself you can see that it was made for weddings, but you must listen to truly see why it can truly be perfect for your first dance.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UoP9ABJXGE
I Choose You by Ryann Darling – Your Mine and all the reasons why. So simple and elegant.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXN-m49MHO0
I Choose You by Sara Bareilles – I little more upbeat than a traditional first dance song, but not everyone wants slow. It’s still easy to sway together or choreograph a dance to.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjE5D9cHiOk
Forever Starts Today by Tim Halperin – Piano lead with beautiful vocals talking about this moment and how it begins your forever together. Very heartwarming and makes my heart smile.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljLCAsnTzEo
Come What May by Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor – Starts soft and romantic and grows into something epic. A beautiful song just waiting for some special choreography to make it come to life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YsMvzgeSuI
Love Someone by Lukas Graham – You’ve probably heard this song on the radio at some point. It’s simple and true and with a good beat to dance together.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dN44xpHjNxE
Bonus First Dance Song
Be My Forever by Christina Perri (feat. Ed Sheeran) – I know I said that these two are overplayed at weddings. But this song that they did together is not only catchy and a little upbeat, but I have yet to hear it used for a dance. So if your up for a little faster paced first dance, this one might be for you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awMQlSqI564
Our First Dance Song
I thought as a fun tidbit I would share my husband and my first dance song. He hates the spotlight, so we wanted short. There were many options we discussed, but this movie is a favorite of mine and we always talk about growing old together. So it was just perfect.
Gone are the days of the black tuxedo, boutonniere, and shiny black shoes. Now it’s so easy to add a piece of your personality to what you wear on your wedding day. From the color of your jacket to your tie (or bowtie for that matter) to even the socks that only get seen in the pictures.
Don’t get me wrong, I love a good boutonniere when placed correctly and made the right size. But I find that those who opt to ditch it for a pocket square look much more polished. A simple piece of fabric that can really elevate a look. It can spice up the most basic of jackets, match a color scheme, create a subtle addition to your outfit or make a bold statement. It all comes down to the color, pattern and most importantly, the fold.
The easiest fold is The Puff fold. Lay the square flat, pinch it in the center and pull up while twisting. It creates something that reminds me of a ghost at Halloween. Keep a hold of the top and put the seams into your pocket. Simple as that. No matter what fold you choose, make sure to practice it before the wedding day. That way when you are all getting ready you aren’t scrambling to figure out how to fold it.
Along with a good fold comes the fabric. Thicker fabrics are great for a crisp edge, especially if folded and pressed in advance. But they can sometimes be bulky and stick out funny in your pocket. Lighter fabrics can make for a more elegant feel and easy for finer detail folds, but if they are too small they can easily slide down into your pocket and disappear during photos. Always keep an eye on where your pocket square is.
When it comes to choosing the color and/or pattern of your pocket square, it may be easy to just grab a coordinating pack of the shelf. But if you want to have a modern look try a patterned pocket square and then pick one color from the palette and match your tie (or bowtie) to that.
A well-cut suit or jacket certainly makes a strong statement, but to really stand out, it’s your accessories that really make all the difference. For even more inspiration on pocket square folds, take a look at this guide on Ties.com.
First thing I must say when tipping your wedding professional team, please remember that it is not a mandatory expense. Gratuities should only be given to those wedding professionals who have gone above and beyond their contracted duties. Small business owners should never be overlooked since their businesses are often run by just one person. Before dishing out gratuity, double-check your contracts. Some professionals will include it in their contract, and I wouldn’t want you double tipping. Also, keep in mind that this is a guide. There really is no set number in what you should tip. You tip what you want, and trust me, any tip a vendor gets will be a surprise.
Lastly, a review is the BEST tip you can give any vendor. So if you cannot tip monetarily, PLEASE remember to at least leave them a glowing review.
THE MYTH ABOUT NOT TIPPING OWNERS
It is not uncommon to read articles that tell you that IF the individual providing the service is also the owner of the company, you do not technically need to tip them. Here is my take on that:
If you were to go out to eat, you would not tip the owner of the restaurant, right? But if the owner was also the person taking your order, making sure you’re taken care of, bringing your food and topping off your drinks, then you would absolutely give them a tip.
It’s my opinion that it works the same for your wedding pros.
If you are using a DJ who is subcontracted to work for a company, you would tip the DJ, not the owner. But if the owner was also the DJ working with you throughout the process AND their playing some killer tunes on your wedding day and keeping all of your guests on the dance floor all night long, then it’s a great idea to pass along a tip to them.
How Much: $50 if you’re married by a judge, clerk or officiant. Clergy members, in general, don’t accept tips, so instead, make a donation to the appropriate house of worship.
MAITRE D’ OR VENUE COORDINATOR
Sometimes referred to as a “Captain” or banquet manager. This tip may already be included in your total agreement with the catering company and/or venue. Be sure to check first.
How Much: $1 – $2 per guest
SERVERS & WAIT STAFF
Look this over carefully PRIOR to the wedding day to avoid double-tipping or forgetting to give them a tip. It may already be included in your caterer or venue contract. If it is not clear whether a tip is provided or how many staff members there will be, ask your contact with that company. Also, keep in mind that a “service charge” is often different than a tip.
How Much: $15-30 per staff member
BARTENDER
You may wish to have a “tip jar” out on the bar where your guests can choose to tip their bartenders. I’m not a huge fan of this, but it’s a personal preference. Just remember if you do not wish to have a tip jar out, that you should then take care of a tip for the bartenders on your guests’ behalf (if it’s not included in your contract). Inform the bartenders of your intent to tip after the reception, and request that they refuse tips from guests.
How Much: 10-15% of the total pre-tax bar bill, which should be split among the bartenders. OR $40-$75 per bartender
DJ & EMCEES
How Much: 10%-15% of the cost of services up to $150
HAIR STYLISTS, MAKE-UP ARTISTS & OTHER BEAUTY TECHNICIANS
How Much: 15-20% of the cost of services
DRIVERS FOR LIMOS, SHUTTLES, BUSSES, TROLLEYS, ETC.
The total tip amount depends on the extent to which they are driving you and/or your guests. Are they just making a few trips, or are they working all day?
How Much: If it is not included in the contract, $50-100 per driver
VALETS, COAT CHECK OR BATHROOM ATTENDANTS
Display a sign stating that gratuities have been taken care of. The staff should also be instructed to refuse any tips offered by guests.
These pros will often be spending the most time with you throughout the day and it’s important to appreciate their hard work and attention to detail. If they will be having any assistants, you can also extend an optional tip to them.
How Much: 5% – 10% of the cost of services – $25-$50+ per assistant, depending on their level of involvement
HOW YOU SHOULD GIVE YOUR WEDDING TEAM THEIR TIPS
It’s most ideal to pass along your wedding vendor tips (and final payments if necessary) to your wedding planner/coordinator or to a trusted family member (like mom or dad). That way you won’t be worrying about getting it to them while you’re occupied with your big day. Make sure they are in sealed envelopes with the person’s name and/or role written on it so that there is no confusion.
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